I had a wonderful, loving, funny, generous and sometimes beautifully eccentric mother who sang and danced and loved passionately, gave herself fully and never missed an opportunity to contribute to another, particularly children and babies - she was a "Baby Magnet". People adored her, she adopted my friends and their children, she was best mates with the butcher, the post master, the post man, the the station manager, the doctor, the pharmacist, and knew everybody by name, including their children and their grandchildren. She worked at Vinnies for thirty years, and knew everybody. She inspired so many people, and was an extraordinary role model for me.
She died four years ago, six months after my own darling Dad died, they loved each other so deeply, they clearly could not be apart. When she died, I did not know how to continue living without her love and guidance, and there were many mornings I struggled to get out of bed. I was a happy, accomplished, successful, confident woman - but I didn’t know who I was without being Vera’s Daughter.
I miss her with all of my being and I long for her laugh, to share with her the big things and the inconsequential details that nobody else is interested in, to dance with, and to cry with.
She told me many times “I will never leave you. I will ALWAYS BE RIGHT AT YOUR SHOULDER” - and I feel her often, I smell her, and feel her warm breath, the power of her love. I her her voice, and she gives me messages, which I always follow, and sometimes she leaves me ‘gifts’.
I was blessed to have her, and my Dad, for almost sixty years. But my longing is still there. Some people do not understand this, as years have passed, and I still weep for her loss. I read somewhere that when you had such a deep and loving relationship with your mother - or anyone - you naturally miss them more than those who have not experienced such a relationship. Your sorrow and your grief have to be so much deeper.
I do not know, but I still ache for her, and for my darling Dad, especially on significant days like Mothers Day, Fathers Day, birthdays, Easter, Anzac Day, Christmas, anniversaries and celebrations of all kinds. And, to be truthful - every day. When I cook, when I hear something funny, or some of ‘their’ music, or when a child laughs, when I see a bird or a feather or a tree or a flower or a field or a mountain or the beloved face of our son, my husband or my dog ......I miss them.
Thank you for this beautiful article. And Happy Mothers Day to all the Mums and Daughters in the World !